Badass Married Guy’s Guide to Gaming: Playing Videogames with your wife


Well, first off, I am not married to a gamer of any kind, be it videogame or board game.  In our five some-odd years of marriage, I have slowly revealed my gamer side to her because if I had gone full on gamer from the start, this blog would have been called Badass Single Guys Guide to Gaming and Being a Saddo.  But in the last year I have tried to get her to play games with me, so now I can share what I have learned for all you gamers who are in a relationship with a non-gamer.

First:  You need to find out what kind of games your partner might like.  I know this sounds like a no-brainer but you can’t just hurl them into just any game that you want to play.  Try casual games first, not only because they offer plenty of variety and can be learned by just about anyone with only a small amount of effort and coaching, but also because the difficulty level can be tweaked to meet the ability of the new player.

A few games I recommend are Catherine (PS3, Xbox360, PC), Brain Age (Wii), Risk (Xbla), and Hidden in Plain Sight (Xblig).  Also, most any game for the Atari 2600 because so many were coded with basic and intuitive controls and are fun for everyone.  ET and some other titles should be avoided because they are unplayably bad.  If you have an Atari, I highly recommend it as a starter system for your would-be gamer.  If you don’t have an Atari, maybe you can purchase one under the guise of  introducing your loved one to something that is very meaningful to your life, which is true.  You also get an Atari 2600 for your own pleasure so it’s a Win/Win.

Second: You, as the experienced gamer, have to remain patient during questions like, ‘Which one is the X button again?’  Remember that you have played games for most of your life and don’t have to think about what button is where.  Keeping your cool with noob questions is the hardest step in the process of piqueing the interest of a non-gamer into gaming.  It is dangerously easy to start speaking in a patronizing tone, and, we can be real about it, no one likes to start something new as an adult and be made to feel dumb because you are not as good as the person teaching you.

Lastly: You can not gloat like you do with every other person you play games with.  No digs, no laughing at inexperience.

I can sum how you should be with this picture here:

Be Cool Don't be an ass

Here come some useful tips.

  • Don’t expect someone new to gaming to be into it as much as you, but they might be,  you never can tell.  Maybe one day you will be playing Bedazzled together and the next day playing a little Battlefield with his and her (or his and his or hers and hers) Xbox 360s.  It could happen.
  • Your non-gaming partner will be able to learn more about you because of observing your gaming style.
  • If your better half is willing to learn about gaming, you are going to need to show more interest in something they are passionate about.

Good luck.  Share your experiences on either side of this learning curve in the comments section.


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2 comments to Badass Married Guy’s Guide to Gaming: Playing Videogames with your wife

  • Chingachgook  says:

    Man you video game gamers have it easy. As a role-playing game gamer, Chingachgook must hide his shame. “Dice? No, Honey, of course not! What kind of dice have more or less than 6 sides? Those are…counters for a project at work. Special, engineering counters. We use them to…keep track of…things.”


    • NinjaJay81  says:

      That’s funny because me and my wife went and bought a D&D set to play together and she seems to be interested and as a nerd of course I’m into it. But I have never played D&D and we learned that apparently you need at least 4 players to play and we have not found a group to join yet. But for me D&D was a way easier sell then videogames.

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